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    2019-04-24 21:51:02 作者:笛語 】 瀏覽:1094次 評論:0
    編者按:有數既無數,老實也不是吃虧。有些事情冥冥之中自有天意,緣起緣滅更需要懂得珍惜。世界并不可怕,可怕的是自己走不出迷惑。這篇小說寫的不錯,內容豐富,給人啟發。

    小曄從小就被別人稱作老實人

    自從她在一年級時扶了老爺爺過馬路,而老爺爺卻突然倒下要她父母來給錢的時候。這個“夸贊”式的稱呼就陪了她到現在的年歲

    “女人就應該努力工作上班,然后賺錢養家,買房子,娶一個不要太英俊,但一定要務實的男人結婚過日子。”小曄的記憶力中,爸爸總是帶著圍裙,一邊做著家務,一邊啰啰嗦嗦的給小曄灌輸做女人的要求。而記憶里的媽媽,一天總是忙東忙西,不茍言笑的樣子。小曄看了都怕。以前小曄不懂為什么媽媽為什么要活得那么累,自從小曄上了大學以后,她就突然明白為什么了。

    “小曄,對不起,我們不可能了。”

    “為什么?在一起兩年了,為什么說分就分?”

    “為什么?你看看你哪里配得上我,別人給自己男朋友買的都是上幾千的球鞋,別的男的用的都是幾千幾萬的東西,你再看看你,和你在一起兩年了,你送過什么東西給我?對了,你家也是一般家庭吧,買套房子也要了大半的財產吧?我還要和你還一輩子的房貸,還有以后孩子的奶粉錢。我的天啊,男人最好的年月也就那么幾年了。你憑什么讓我把它們都給你?”

    小曄愣了下,沒能再繼續挽留下去。每個人都有弱點,就像是貧窮的人在別人秀優越的時候默默不語,無能的人在別⼈展示才華的時候緘口不言。貧窮和無能是他們的軟肋,就算是再樂觀,再不拘⼩小節的人,觸碰到了他們的軟肋,還是會覺得失落。失落了好久的小曄。盯著那道身影漸行漸遠

    小曄其實在睡夢中到過另一個世界,在那里,男人掙錢養家,女孩子在戀愛中可以向男生撒嬌發脾氣。小曄覺得這個世界美妙極了,可是黃粱一夢,醒來,那個世界的影子都看不到一個。

    但是再怎么幻想下去。日子還是得過。生活可不會因為一個人的苦累而停下來啊。

    其實小曄知道,當女人不容易,當男人也難啊。爸爸從小就教育她:“以后長大不要隨意辜負人家的男孩子,要記得承擔一個女子的責任”。奇怪的是,每次說這話。不茍言笑的媽媽就會咂咂嘴,低聲嘀咕說上一句。至于是什么,小曄直到現在還沒聽清楚。

    “老實人”這個稱呼,其實小曄一點也不喜歡

    小曄一直覺得,老實人怎么了?老實人難道不好嗎?難道世界上非要遺棄或者嘲笑這種善良?小曄喜歡看書,她喜歡靜下心來思考一些東西,同時也喜歡在圖書館里面泡一天,針對這種情況,宿舍的幾個姐們替她著想起來。

    “小曄,不是姐妹說你,天天看書也沒啥用,讀個大學不找個男朋友有啥用?”

    “我干嘛要去找男朋友,我不會說話,男生敏感的要死,我怕一個惹他們生氣,又不把話說清楚,總是繞繞彎彎的,總叫人難受。”

    “嗨,哪個男生不是這樣的,男孩子就是這點好笑。遇到那種地地道道的雜種——十分卑鄙,或者十分自高自大——你每次只要一跟小伙子們提起,他們就會說她有自卑感……小伙子們的問題是,他們要是喜歡什么人,不管她是個多下流的雜種,他們總要說她有自卑感;要是他們不喜歡她,那么不管她是個多好的家伙,或者她有多大的自卑感,他們都會說她自高自大。連聰明的男生也免不了。我給你說,你可別太傻,傻乎乎的告訴別人你喜歡他,這個時代,真情不值錢了,收起你那可憐可笑的文藝女青年思想。給我想點套路,不要對他太好,也不要太壞,和他曖昧一點。然后欲擒故縱,你要是傻乎乎的告訴別人你喜歡別人,那你就被別人吊著吧,那時候活該被接盤。男孩子嘛,最貴的東西也就是他們的第一次了,你把他騙到手,和他上床了以后,他還不什么都依著你啊?到時候你就是造物主,你說什么就是什么,你出軌了,他們還會傻兮兮的給你機會哩。聽姐們的話,自己去找一個男的,辦了他,你就懂得那玩意兒的美妙了。到時候愛情算個屁。哪個女人不睡過幾十個男的就算虧!”

    小曄覺得有時候這個世界有點可怕,她覺得喜歡就是喜歡,該說就說。至于糟蹋一個男孩子,她可死活都沒想到過,她和前男友在一起兩年始終相敬如賓,中間雖然有過幾次荷爾蒙的摩擦,都被她自己控制住了,感情結束,兩個人依然都沒發生什么事。可能是書本讓人變得理性,也可能是她討厭這種不負責任的做法。所以到現在目前為止她一旦提起來這事。別人就會哈哈大笑。

    在她們的大笑中,小曄總覺得真是一個可怕的地方,在這笑聲中有時候她感到孤獨。甚至感到沮喪。她們說:“男人的身體好像一把小提琴,只有大音樂家才能演奏出好的音樂”。可惜小曄現在目前為止,還是個音癡。

    于是今晚小曄睡得很早。還做了一個朦朦朧朧的夢

    夢里總是有很多人在小曄耳邊模模糊糊的一直說話;

    “小曄,聽姐姐的,在學校里面多多和老師打好關系,以后你出來工作,他們能給你幫助”

    “小曄,渣一點,這年頭,男人有幾個好東西,要吃咱們的,用咱們的,到頭來,不知道是一個幾手貨,還想咱們付出一生。什么玩夠了,找好女人接盤,我呸,你看他們配嗎?”

    “小曄啊,爸爸從小就給你說過,做一個女人,要頂天立地,要負起你的責任,真正的愛,不是肉體上的占有,而靈魂上的祝福。真正的愛,是你屬于我,我屬于你,我們終究都屬于自由。要記住,如果你真的決定了一個男人,解下了他的紐扣,帶回來見爸爸吧。”

    “小曄,人總會變的,我已經不愛你了,謝謝你對我兩年的照顧,我過上了現在我想要的生活,名牌鞋子,幾千幾萬的領帶。但是,為什么感覺沒有當初那種快樂了呢?這個女人,她總是把我綁起來,以折磨我來獲得她性上面的快感。我想我只能希望和祝福你一直努力下去,成為你想做的人。”

    “小曄……”

    “小曄……”

    小曄突然醒了,滿背冷汗。

    她從床上爬了起來,看著空蕩蕩的寢室,不知道那群室友又去哪里玩男人去了。

    她跑到陽臺上點了根煙,她抽的兇極了,接著她說:“坦白說,我簡直不知道跟你說什么好,小曄。”

    “但是我知道,很少有人和我脾氣那么像,和我談得來。小曄,謝謝你,我心中有數。”

    贊(9) 贊賞與支持
    最近閱讀文友: [] [肖桂才] [笛語] [素顏鴿] [半城寺] (查看更多)
         
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